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  • Fresh Avocado

20 things to do in Wellington as a Wellingtonian - Joshua Toumu'a

  • Shine laser pointers into your local airspace

  • Press every button in your car

On state highway 1

  • Get a job in IT &

Disappear into the Akatarawa bush

4 years in

  • Eat the rich

(might be tough due to peloton overuse)

  • Gather every e-scooter and form

crop circles around the bucket fountain

  • Invent a new language

  • Spread misinformation

In large political forums

  • Spend your life savings on Lovisa

And kitsch porcelain figures

  • Write a famous novel series &

get cremated with the final installation’s only copy

  • Steal a crocodile bike & ride off into the sunset

  • Catch the bus again & again

Until you learn to sit very still

and let time pass around you

  • Walk uphill for half an hour

  • Create a competitive sport out of loitering

Where you win every competition

But you can’t shake the feeling

Some high school student

Is doing better than you

  • Become a part-time poet/part-time Subway employee

  • Lose hope & become a part-time Subway employee

/part-time “I'm just figuring myself out right now”

  • Major in film and minor in talking about being a film major

  • Find yourself in a McDonald’s bathroom

  • Find love in a vegan bakery & cafe

  • Finish high school & promise

You will leave Wellington soon

Just

Not

Right

Now

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